Scotty's Bum of the Week- Fri, 10/23/15

This week's loser is Colts head coach, Chuck Pagano

It been five days and I still can’t believe what I saw. This dumpster fire was picked to go to the Super Bowl by pretty much everyone? What. Were. They. Thinking? Pete Carroll is officially off the hook. The fake punt that the Indianapolis Colts attempted Sunday night was the worst play call, formation, and execution of a play that I have seen in all of my years watching football. If Garo Yepremian was still with us, he likely would have smirked and said to himself “Jeez, even my gaffe wasn’t THAT bad.” The Butt Fumble officially has company in the long list of NFL blunders. For those of you who didn’t see the aforementioned worst play ever, I’ll recap it quickly for you. After getting steamrolled by New England for the past few years, the Colts did what many (including myself) thought was impossible: they made it a game. With two minutes left in the third quarter, they were down 27-21 and had a chance to secure a potentially season-altering win. Facing a 3rd and 3 from their own 37 yard line, Colts QB Andrew Luck’s pass to Donte Moncrief fell incomplete and forced Indy to punt…or so we thought. Nine of the eleven Colts ran to the right side of the line of scrimmage, leaving safety Colt Anderson under center to ‘take the snap’ from WR Griff Whalen. We’ve all seen this a million times. They were simply trying catch the Pats with 12 men on the field, or draw the Pats offside. It probably wasn’t going to work because the Patriots are too smart and too disciplined, but hell…it’s worth a try. If they couldn’t draw them off, just take the delay of game, step back five yards and punt it away. They’re not going to snap it with five Patriots defenders literally in their grill. And then, incredibly, the ball was snapped. Anderson seemed stunned to the point that he barely plowed forward, right into Brandon Bolden, and the Pats took over on downs…loss of one yard on the play. Predictably, the Pats scored a touchdown to go up 34-21 early in the fourth and essentially clinched the game. My first reaction was complete disbelief, shortly followed by roughly 43 seconds of hysterical laughter. No joke, my ribs hurt the next day. Just when you thought that the Patriots couldn’t embarrass the Colts any more than they had in their previous four meetings, Indy managed to embarrass themselves even worse. Even if the play had been successful, the formation was illegal and would have been wiped out anyway! The entire offensive line was two yards behind the line of scrimmage! The ball never should have been snapped, but this one is on Chuck Pagano. You’re finally in a competitive game with New England, and NOW you decide to get cute? What’s his explanation for this brain cramp? This I got to hear. “The whole idea there was on a fourth-and-3 or less, shift the alignment to where you either catch them misaligned, they try to sub people in, catch them with more men on the field, 12 men on the field and if you get a certain look you got three yards, two yards and you can make a play,” Pagano said. “I didn’t do a good enough job of coaching it during the week. Alignment-wise we weren’t lined up correctly and then [there was] a communication breakdown between the quarterback and the snapper and that’s all on me.” You didn’t do a good enough job? That’s the understatement of year. This one play encapsulates the Patriots/Colts “rivalry.” New England is prepared for any given situation during a game, and they practice everything ad nauseam because Bill Belichick has been around long enough to know that nothing can be taken for granted on Sunday. The Colts have glaring weaknesses on the defensive sides of the ball, and draft a receiver with their first round pick. Stupid is as stupid does. This team is so poorly coached and poorly constructed that they would be a four-win team if Andrew Luck were not their quarterback, and it boggles my mind that “experts” expected this team to be the class of the AFC. Newsflash for the cry babies in Indy: Jim Irsay is not Robert Kraft, Chuck Pagano is nowhere close to Bill Belichick, and Andrew Luck isn’t Peyton Manning let alone Tom Brady. The call was bad enough, but then to say publicly that you don’t regret the call is inexcusable. I think I’ve made my point; Chuck Pagano is the BUM of the Week.